ONE QUESTION

What negative judgments are you making towards others in an attempt to make yourself feel better?

ONE THING TO PONDER

Be less distracted by status and more interested in being valuable.

ONE PERSPECTIVE

I have nothing to prove to you. 

What happens when we operate from that space?

Sometimes the most powerful gift is permission to stop this incessant need to prove ourselves to others.

And, I believe that we can take advantage of every day to prove ourselves to the future version we’d welcome to see in ourselves. 

I've noticed a pattern in myself. It seems obvious but took me a looooong time to recognize. 

The more I try to prove my value, showcase my skills, or demonstrate how "awesome" I am (cue eye roll), the further I drift from who I really am.

The Validation Trap

Consider your own life for a moment:

• How much of your daily energy goes into convincing others of your point of view?

• How many of your decisions are made seeking approval from others?

• How often do you share something on social media hoping for validation?

It's exhausting. It becomes a game with no finish line. Once our bucket gets filled, we dump it out to do it all over again. 

We've created an unsolvable equation: we believe we can only experience joy when everything aligns perfectly AND when everyone behaves exactly as we think they should.

We are ultimately walking contradictions….

• We resist when others try to convince us to change, while simultaneously expecting everyone else to conform to our vision.

There is deep freedom that comes from allowing people to do what they are going to do. We don’t have to get spun up on what they are doing….we then have information to make decisions once people show us who they are. 

I've learned to listen often, but watch more carefully. You can say whatever you want, but I'm listening with my eyes based on what you DO.

We tend to focus a lot of our time and energy on how others ‘should’ live, which is simply a deflection of the work and self-awareness we should be striving towards for ourselves. 

Life gets a whole hell of a lot easier when we choose to allow people to be who they are, it’s not our job to change others. It’s our job to change and develop ourselves. 

There is huge growth and potential that happens when I don’t feel any need to prove myself to anyone.

Your authenticity eliminates the need to compete with others. It’s you vs you. 

Onward and upward! 

Jake

P.S. ✍️ THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE

Choose ONE interaction each day where you typically feel the need to prove yourself or your point. Instead, approach it with genuine curiosity and zero attachment to being "right." Note what shifts.

Then, reply to this email with your biggest insight from this experiment.

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