ONE QUESTION

Can you be happy knowing that you have what you need, but not what you ‘want’?

ONE THING TO PONDER

It sucks not to be liked. What sucks even more is not being yourself.

ONE PERSPECTIVE -

Assuming January 1st will change your habits is an illusion. 

Let's get real: January 1st isn't magical. It's just another square on the calendar. Yet every year, we treat it like a reset button for our lives. Here's the uncomfortable truth: If you're banking on a date to transform your life, you're already setting yourself up for failure.

January 19th is Quitters Day. The most common day people quit their new year’s resolution.

We underestimate the hidden costs of casual commitments. 

When you whisper "yes" while your gut screams "no," you're not just breaking promises—you're chipping away at your self-trust.

Each abandoned resolution isn't just a failed goal; it's a crack in your foundation of self-belief.

Ask yourself: Is this promise one your future self will thank you for making, or curse you for breaking?

I have an issue with ‘productive guilt.’ And I’m still working on it. 

That guilt you feel for ‘taking a break’, for resting. I completely can grasp the logic, I’m working on feeling that logic when I take time to rest. 

It’s that nagging guilt when you're not being "productive enough"? That taskmaster pushing you to do more, be more, achieve more? Here's the plot twist: That guilt isn't your ally—it's your saboteur.

So then we should ask the question, why do habits fail? There are a lot of reasons, yet I’m interested in the foundation:

• It's not about knowledge—you already know what to do

• It's not about willpower—you've got plenty of that

• It's about understanding the real drivers of your behavior

• Then it’s simply about action…nothing changes until we DO something.

Your habits aren't failing because you lack discipline. They're failing because they're built on shaky foundations:

• Fear of not being enough

• Guilt about past failures

• Shame and judgment about where you are

• A desperate grab for external validation

Want real, lasting change? Here's your roadmap:

1. Search for a deeper understanding of yourself: Every habit you have serves a purpose. What void is it filling?

2. Face the Truth: Your current behaviors aren't random—they're solutions to problems you haven't named yet

3. Build new habits from a place of self-compassion, not self-criticism

Before you make another commitment, ask yourself:

• What's really driving this change?

• Am I ready for the inconvenience of commitment?

• Is this promise aligned with who I want to become?

The January 19th Challenge

Quitters Day is coming. But here's the real question: Will you be among those who quit, or among those who understand that real change isn't about dates—it's about decisions? The smallest decisions and promises everyday. 

If you take anything from this newsletter, remember this:

SMALL THINGS LEAD TO BIG THINGS - THE DIRECTION OF THAT ARROW DEPENDS ON YOU. 

I love that we always have a choice, don’t squander that gift. 

Onward and upward!

P.S.  Let's beat January 19th! Reply with your comments! —not what you're going to do, but why you won't be part of the January 19th statistics.

PODCAST

The Science of Making and Breaking Habits

The Mindset Mentor with Rob Dial

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